Hey there :) I can see why you would be worried about the issues that your pony has, but to be honest you need to be taught in person so that you can fully achieve (and not mess around with your horse) the benefits of creating a bond/trust between yourself and the said horse.
For now, you can focus on the basics: no, the fundementals. No whips are needed. Practice leading your horse and you can achieve a sort of in-hand join-up: Circle to the left, back up a few paces (eyes on eyes and use the lead rope to gently ease him backwards - but be sure of what you're doing otherwise the horse will sense your lack in confidence), circle to the right, back up, circle to the left, back up, circle to the right, back up. The next step is walking forwards, that is once your horse is following on the circles without you having to ask him to. To be in control, you have to own every direction that the horse can use, which is why backing up is essential to learning join-up. Walk a few confident steps forwards, then halt. If he walks past you, immeditaly back him up, firmly but not in any way agressively! Horse see agression and anger as weaknesses.
Be sure that you don't allow his shoulder to pass yours, it's a good sign if he stops at your shoulder because it indicates that he knows his boundaries. Every time he achieves what you ask of him, give him a rub for doing well: when you ask him to walk on, circle on etc. don't retain eye-contact as in horse language that means 'go away'. Only look into his eyes firmly when you are asking him to back-up, and so move away from you. If you find it difficult to back him up, walk into his shoulder with confidence and if that ceases to work also, place a gentle hand on his lower-face (just above his nose) and gently push his nose towards his chest and walk towards him. I must stress that this shouldn't be done to horses who are claimed 'head-shy' and SHOULD NOT be performed by an unknowledgeable person. I'd wait for someone experienced in natural horsemanship to carry this out.
Don't try this straight away, as reading and theory are far different from actually performing a task. If you like, get someone you know to pretend to be your horse, and practice the circles and backing up with them, trust me, it'll help, however crazy it sounds!
Once you and your horse have done this for about a week, once or twice a day (continue to keep your personal space even in the stable by asking him to move out of your way rather than walking around him, and back him up and circle before riding: as if you own the directions on the ground you are more likely to ride far better) you will be able to un-clip the lead rope (if your yard allows it) and he will, if bonded/joined-up, continue to follow you even without the line.
This is a form of join-up and creates a great bond between you and your horse, and I thoroughly recommend trying it out with Dylan, he sounds like a lovely boy :) Another thing you can do, is scratch his withers! I know, strange thing to do, but it's what horses would do in the wild and he'll really enjoy a good scratch! Grooming helps too, but I'm sure you know that :)
Good luck, and if you have any questions, don't hesitate to message me or ask on here. I'm far from the most experienced person 